Mother's Day Talk - I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus

Years ago when I was a first time mom, my older sister, who was at the tail end of hands on mothering, said that motherhood is the only job where by the time you figure out what you're doing, you're out of a job. Now past the time of being a hands on mom myself I've found that to be true. I'd do a much better job of raising our children if I could do it over with the knowledge and experience that I have now. Because I hope to be an eternal heavenly mother I don't have to stop learning and growing in the skills and knowledge it takes to be a perfect mother. We don't know anything about our eternal mother other than that she exists, but our Heavenly Parents sent a very special brother of ours to earth to be our example. Jesus Christ teaches us how to be a celestial being, and how to be able to live in the Celestial world. He told us to follow Him; He told us to do the things we saw him do, and He told us that we ought to be like Him.

While not all women will get the opportunity to be physical mothers in this life we all can be spiritual and emotional mothers to those around us. We all can develop the qualities and characteristics of Jesus.

I remember more than once singing with the children in Primary "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus", and feeling convicted by the Spirit that I wasn't doing very well being like Him in my mothering.  Do you know the words?

I'm trying to be like Jesus; I'm following in His ways.

I'm trying to love as he did, in all that I do and say.

At times I am tempted to make a wrong choice,

But I try to listen as the still small voice whispers,

 

Love one another as Jesus loves you.

Try to show kindness in all that you do.

Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,

For these are the things Jesus taught.

 

I'm trying to love my neighbor; I'm learning to serve my friends.

I watch for the day of gladness when Jesus will come again.

I try to remember the lessons he taught.

Then the Holy Spirit enters into my thoughts, saying:

 

Love one another as Jesus loves you.

Try to show kindness in all that you do.

Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,

For these are the things Jesus taught.

I'd like to review some of the ways we can try to be like Jesus and be a better person, male or female, better women, and better mothers.

Jesus knew the scriptures. Of course He did, He dictated them to the prophets! But during His mortal ministry He used them to refute Satan's lies in His hour of temptation. He used them to teach others, and He used them when testifying of His mission.

I sat in the Tabernacle in 1978 listening to President Spencer W. Kimball speak, and what he said has directed my life ever since. Speaking to the women of the church he said:

"Study the scriptures. Thus you may gain strength through the understanding of eternal things. You young women need this close relationship with the mind and will of our Eternal Father. We want our sisters to be scholars of the scriptures as well as our men. You need an acquaintanceship with his eternal truths for your own well being, and for the purposes of teaching your own children and all others who come within your influence." (Oct. 1978 Privileges and Responsibilities of Sisters)

We can be like Jesus by studying the scriptures, filling our minds and hearts with the word of God so it can be recalled when needed for teaching and testifying.

Jesus loved and welcomed children. Matthew records, "Then some children were brought to him so that he would lay hands upon them and pray, but the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, Allow the little children to come to me, and do not hinder them, because the kingdom of heaven belongs to ones like these." (Matt 19:14  The New Testament A Translation for Latter-Day Saints, Thomas A. Wayment)

 

Once when I was surrounded by the clamoring demands of five young children I told them to leave me alone, they were interrupting my work. Immediately into my mind the Spirit spoke "These children ARE your work!" Oh, . . . right. I forgot that I had entered into a partnership with God to assist in His work of bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, by me bringing to pass the mortal life and spiritual education of five of His spirit children. It was a sobering moment.

 

Julie B. Beck, former Relief Society General President, said, "More than at any other time in the history of the world we need mothers who know. . . . When mothers know who they are and who God is and have made covenants with Him, they will have great power and influence for good on their children." (Oct 2007, Mothers Who Know)

 

While Sheri L. Dew, a single sister, was serving in the General Relief Society Presidency, she said,

As daughters of our Heavenly Father, and as daughters of Eve, we are all mothers and we have always been mothers. And we each have responsibilities to love and help lead the rising generation. How will our young women learn to live as women of God unless they see what women of God look like, meaning what we wear, watch, and read; how we fill our time and our minds; how we face temptation and uncertainty; where we find true joy; and why modesty and femininity are hallmarks of righteous women? How will our young men learn to value women of God if we don't show them the virtue of our virtues?" (Oct 2001, Are We Not All Mothers?)

 

We can be like Jesus by welcoming children into our lives, whether by birth, or adoption, or friendship, and leading them to the Savior and Our Heavenly Father.

 

Jesus taught His followers spiritual concepts, doctrines and principles in ways they could understand using familiar situations and objects. He taught them through parables, or stories.

 

The more we study the gospel in scriptures and general conference talks the easier it is to teach others. Filling our minds with things of eternity gives the Holy Ghost so much more to work with when bringing things to our remembrance when teaching moments arise.

 

We can be like Jesus by turning off the distractions of worldly media then looking at the natural world around us, inside and outside, to see what connections we can make to gospel doctrines and principles. Alma told Korihor that ". . . all things denote there is a God . . ." (Alma 30:44) Object lessons are all around us if we'll just look, and then share them with others as part of our testimonies.

 

Jesus went about doing good. He mercifully healed the blind, deaf, lame, leprous, and withered. And we're told by John that if all Jesus did ". . . should be written every one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that should be written." (John 21:25)

 

We can be merciful like Jesus in similar ways. Many around us are blinded by the subtle indoctrination of worldly attitudes and falsehoods. We can teach truth and lead others to the Light of the Gospel. Some are so centered on self or other idols that they cannot hear. Perhaps our quiet example would help them to understand an unspoken testimony of the Plan of Salvation, and invite them to listen to the whisperings of the Spirit. Some are lame and halted by sin or addiction and unable to motivate or discipline themselves. Maybe they could lean on our strength as they allow the Savior to rebuild their own. Some people are leprous with sinful worldly attitudes and need to be bathed in love and acceptance to be able to change. Some are withered by an absence of hope and need our cheerful optimism and faithful obedience as a guide to looking to the Savior and His Plan. No matter how someone is afflicted we can lead them to the healing power of Jesus Christ.

 

Jesus comforted those who were mourning. Mary and Martha's brother Lazarus died and the sisters were bereft. He comforted them by testifying that He is the resurrection and the life, and "though [Lazaruz is] dead, yet shall he live." (John 11:25) Then when Jesus was led to the sepulcher He wept. He too mourned the death of a friend. He understands.

 

We can be like Jesus by mourning with those who are bereft by the death of a loved one. We can comfort them with our testimony of the resurrection. We can share strength and hope as we continue together on our own mortal journeys.

 

Jesus was encouraging to those who struggled. When the woman caught in adultery was brought before Him, He didn't join in the mob's condemnation of her. He asked the mob to examine their own consciences, then waiting until they dispersed, He said to the woman, "Neither do I condemn thee; go and sin no more." (John 8:11)

 

We can be like Jesus by encouraging others to repent and turn from their sins, without condemning them for their sins. We can be a light and example to lead them to the redeeming power of the Savior to forgive and restore a life mired in sin. His example of asking a penetrating question to disburse the mob, then waiting for a private moment to speak to the sinner is instructive to us on how to treat others, especially children.

 

Jesus showed a firm, controlled hand when confronting evil and wickedness. At the time of the passover, ". . . Jesus went up to Jerusalem, and found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting: And when he had a made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise." (John 2:13-16)

 

We can be like Jesus by not allowing into our homes or church buildings any worldly things or practices that prevent or detract from having the Spirit of the Lord in our holy places. King Benjamin taught, ". . .neither will ye suffer that they (our own children or others in our care) transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our  fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness. But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another."  (Mosiah 4:14-15)

 

Sometimes we have to put our foot down and take a firm, hard stance against the evils that attempt to creep into our homes. Jesus didn't want any pollutions in His Father's house and neither should we want any in ours.

 

After washing His apostle's feet before their last passover meal together, Jesus instructed them, ". . . I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you." (John 13:15) And "If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them." (John 13:17)

 

I'm trying to be like Jesus, I hope you are too. We know it's hard because Satan doesn't want us to be like Jesus. He wants us to be miserable like himself, carnal (giving in to our fleshy appetites), sensual (trusting only our five senses and neglecting our spiritual side), and devilish (giving in to temptation, disregarding our covenants, and disobeying the commandments). But together, as we encourage and nurture each other we can overcome the devil and walk with Jesus on the path to Eternal Life. He is with us every step of the way, as long as we are trying, repenting, and trying again.

 

I testify that God, Our Heavenly Father lives. Jesus Christ is our Spiritual Father, Savior and Redeemer, Example and Friend. We can grow to be like them because it is in our spiritual DNA to do so.

 

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Mother's Day 2024

Do Not Fear

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday Morning session of the April 2004 conference.

I remember this session as being one of the best to date when I heard it. All of the talks were so inspired and uplifting. Trite, I know, but what other words describe the feelings of listening to prophetic counsel and admonition?

In 2004 our five children were ages 6 to 15. Now they are 25 to 34; three of our boys are married, and our daughter would sure like to be. Elder Boyd K. Packer's talk is as relevant today as when it was given. In fact, more so. 

Everywhere we go fathers and mothers worry about the future of their children in this very troubled world.

But then a feeling of assurance came over me. My fear of the future faded.

That guiding, comforting Spirit, with which we in the Church are so familiar, brought to my remembrance what I already knew. The fear of the future was gone. That bright-eyed, little two-year-old can have a good life--a very good life--and so can his children and his grandchildren, even though they will live in a world where there is much of wickedness.

 

I remember this talk when I look at my own grandchildren, and counsel my own children not to be afraid of bringing more children into the world. I remind them that when God gives a commandment, to be fruitful and multiply, He prepares a way for us to obey that commandment. "Do not be afraid to bring children into the world. We are under covenant to provide physical bodies so that spirits may enter mortality. Children are the future of the restored Church."

Elder Packer spoke of inoculation, and immunizing our children,

"If you will accept it in your mind and cradle it in your feelings, a knowledge of the restored gospel and a testimony of Jesus Christ can spiritually immunize your children." Then he spoke of arming our children, "This shield of faith is best fabricated in a cottage industry. While the shield can be polished in classes in the Church and in activities, it is meant to be handcrafted in the home and fitted to each individual." 

Another of Elder Packer's oft quoted statements is in this talk, "True doctrine, understood, changes attitudes and behavior. The study of the doctrines of the gospel will improve behavior quicker that a study of behavior will improve behavior." This was my guiding principle when I was a Relief Society president and teaching the sisters the why and how of Visiting Teaching (2012-2015). It was important that they understand the doctrine of the practice, not just be told to do it. When they understood the why it was easier for them to act upon their knowledge and their testimonies grew. It was one of the best parts of my calling.

Not every child is obedient and most families have someone who has strayed. Elder Packer gives stern but kind and hopeful counsel to parents, "Remember the Atonement of Christ. Do not despair or count as forever lost those who have fallen to the temptations of Satan. They will, after the debt is paid to 'the uttermost farthing' and after the healing which attends complete repentance takes place, receive a salvation."

I know the Lord is more merciful than we can comprehend. I know He is more patient and loving than we deserve. I know He loves us more than words can express. He is the perfect parent, the perfect example for us as parents.

Uncle James and Conrad

 

 

 

Choices

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Priesthood session of the April 2004 conference.

President Monson called the priesthood holders to have and exhibit more courage. He gave the memorable one-liner, "Decisions do determine destiny."

President Faust gave a whole talk about how "Tomorrow's blessings and opportunities depend on the choices we make today."

Years ago as a young adult I made a choice that has affected my life ever since. No matter how much or how thoroughly I repent of that sinful choice I am followed by the consequences of it. At times it has been so discouraging. President Faust said, "The choices we make, however, determine to a large extent our happiness or our unhappiness, because we have to live with the consequences of our choices." 

Some of our important choices have a time line. If we delay a decision, the opportunity is gone forever. Sometimes our doubts keep us from making a choice that involves change. Thus an opportunity may be missed.

Other choices I made early in life have also had a detrimental effect on my life. They weren't sinful choices, just uninformed or unevaluated choices. I often wish I'd had better guidance and information on which to base my choices. I've tried hard to not perpetuate that mistake in the lives of my children. I've worked to help them see all angles and outcomes of significant choices they face.

A choice involves making a conscious decision. To make an intelligent decision we need to evaluate all available facts on both sides of an issue. But that isn't enough. Making correct decisions involves prayer and inspiration.

President Faust was such a wise man and apostle. He had a great sense of humor too. But he wasn't kidding around when he said, "As we look to the future, we are going to need to be stronger and more responsible for our choices in a world where people 'call evil good, and good evil.' We do not choose wisely if we use our agency in opposition to God's will or to priesthood counsel." No, he wasn't joking, we was prophetic.

 

Earthly Debts, Heavenly Debts

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday afternoon session of the April 2004 conference.

"The number of marriages that have been shattered over money issues is staggering. The amount of heartache is great. The stress that comes from worry over money has burdened families, caused sickness, depression, and even premature death."

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin understands! So do I.

In 2005 I was asked to present at the BYU Women's Conference on the subject of Facing Economic Challenges through Provident Living.

At the risk of throwing my husband under the bus, almost all of our financial troubles can be traced to his not consistently obeying the financial commandments, and living by the principles outlined by Elder Wirthlin:

1) Pay tithing

2) Spend less than you earn

3) Learn to save

4) Honor your financial obligations

5) Teach your children to follow your example

Thankfully all our children have listened to my gospel teachings and have learned to save, live within their means, etc. Their Dad has been a good example of what not to do.

I especially appreciate what Elder Wirthlin says about what we're to use our financial abundance for:

"There are those among us who have been blessed abundantly with enough and to spare. Our Heavenly Father expects that we do more with our riches than build larger barns to hold them. Will you consider what more you can do to build the kingdom of God? Will you consider what more you can do to bless the lives of others and bring light and hope into their lives?"

I have given more thought to exactly that and am looking at what I can contribute, and what I can sacrifice to do so.

Elder Wirthlin goes on to talk about our heavenly debts. "How can we ever repay the debt we owe to the Savior? He paid a debt He did not owe to free us from a debt we can never pay. Because of Him, we will live forever. Because of His infinite Atonement, our sins can be swept away, allowing us to experience the greatest of all the gifts of God: eternal life. . . . How wise is he who spends his days in pursuit of eternal life."

Having cleared out homes after four deaths I totally understand that the things of this world stay in this world; it's all just stuff. Who we are and what we have in our brain and in our heart is what we take with us to the next life. 

Now, I've got a closet to clear out.

Choosing the Good Part

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the General Relief Society session of the October 2003 conference.

During a week of feeling discouraged it was lovely to read talks that fed my soul and helped to overcome those negative feelings.

The Relief Society General Presidency chose their theme from the story of Mary and Martha found in Luke 10:38-42. 

Sister Bonnie D. Parkin said, "The one thing that is needful is to choose eternal life. We choose daily. As we seek, listen, and follow the Lord, we are encircled in the arms of His love--a love that is pure. . . . Charity is our love for the Lord, shown through our acts of service, patience, compassion, and understanding for one another. . . . I invite you to not only love each other more but love each other better. . . . I've learned that the best way to reclaim charity is to uncumber myself and simply love and serve the Lord. How do we do that? We start each day kneeling in prayer to our Father in Heaven, we hear His words through daily scripture study, and we follow the guidance we receive. We put Christ first, restoring charity's circular love. 'We love him, because he first loved us.' This is the reciprocating cycle of charity. Sisters, 'charity never faileth.'"

Lately, because of seeing the film The Boys in the Boat, and rereading the book from which it was made, I have felt a great desire to be part of something. As I listened to the talks of this session of conference I realized that what I really want is for Relief Society to fulfill those longings. When I was young watching my grandmother, mother and older sister participate in Relief Society I couldn't wait to be part of it myself. But things changed while I was serving a mission, the block schedule of Sunday meetings came into being and I never got the chance to be part of the Relief Society that I had observed in my youth. More disappointingly is that it seems to have devolved into just another Sunday school class twice a month where we have tepid book review style lessons of general conference talks. I used to believe what the general leaders said about Relief Society being a force for good in the world. I suppose it is in some places, but I've not experienced it where I've lived, especially in the past dozen years in tiny branches.

Yes, I'm complaining, because I truly want to be on a team that does something important, and ongoing in the world. I can do things by myself, but that doesn't fulfill my longings for sisterhood, camaraderie, or synergy. I've also learned by hurtful experiences that neither suggestions nor initiative are welcomed by some RS presidents.

Me and my best girlfriend, my daughter

Reinforce Your Testimony - Study General Conference Talks

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday afternoon session of the October 2003 conference.

I don't have Marilyn's, at light-in-leaves, eloquence and style when writing these posts; it's something I'm going to work on this year. I find that reading these general conference talks reinforces my testimony of what I know to be true and encourages me that I'm on the right path. Occasionally, a nugget of new knowledge or understanding comes along and I think, Yes! Why didn't I think of that? This post is going to share a little of each talk in this session.

Elder L. Tom Perry - "Revelation, however is a much broader term. While inspiration can properly be considered as revelation, revelation includes vision, dreams, the spoken word, or other spiritual manifestations." I remember the best part of being a Relief Society president was the almost daily revelation that I received to lead the sisters. I rather miss that!

Elder Henry B. Eyring - He spoke of the three witnesses of the Book of Mormon never losing their testimony of the truthfulness of what they experienced, even though they left the church. "They did some simple things to keep that testimony bright and vibrant. We can teach those we love to do those same things. . . . #1 Teach them to pray to the Father in faith in the name of Jesus Christ. . . . We can teach those we love to pray with the intent to obey. #2 Teach them to ponder the scriptures every day with faith that they will be taught by the Spirit. . . . You and those you love will receive the word of God by obeying it. . . . #3 Teach them to sacrifice to build up the kingdom of God. . . . #4 Teach them to love others by serving them. I'm still working on all these things myself. I pray that Heavenly Father will make up for my failures to properly teach all this to my children.

Elder William W. Parmley - "Our love for the Savior must be accompanied by action: 'If ye love me, keep my commandments' (John 14:15)." It's the 'faith without works is dead' argument.

Elder Quentin L. Cook - "It is not easy to be a Latter-day Saint. It was not meant to be easy. The ultimate goal of living in the presence of God the Father and His Son, Jesus Christ, is a privilege almost beyond comprehension. . . . May I suggest three questions that will allow for a self-assessment. First, is the way we live consistent with what we believe, and would our friends and associates recognize, . . . that we have separated ourselves from worldly evils? Second, are worldly pleasures, profits, and similar pursuits distracting us from following, worshipping, and serving the Savior in our daily lives? Third, in order to serve God and be holy, are we making sacrifices consistent with our covenants?" These questions came at the right time as I ponder what I want to accomplish in the new year.

Bishop Richard C. Edgley - "Humility and gratitude are truly the twin characteristics of happiness. . . . It matters not who we are or how lofty our credentials appear. Humility and submissiveness to the Lord, coupled with a grateful heart, are our strength and our hope."

Elder Neal A. Maxwell - "God has no distracting hobbies off somewhere in the universe. We are at the very center of His concerns and purpose. . . . A further reality of our being with God 'in the beginning' means that you have been you for a long time. . . . An omnicompetent God leaves all mortal free to choose, but how grateful we should be that God chose long, long ago to rescue and to resurrect all His children through the Atonement of His Son. . . . How trascendingly special, therefore, that the the revelations of the Restoration confirm this cosmic fact: 'God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son' (John 3:16)." Elder Maxwell's eloquence and vivid metaphors make his talks so meaningful and memorable.

President Gordon B. Hinckley - "It is truly a wonderful thing to step out of the world, as it were, and set aside two days to reflect on things divine. We are all so busy with our mundane pursuits which pull us this way and that. We all need, the whole world needs, the opportunity to meditate and reflect on the things of God and to listen to words that inspire and help." I plan to share this quote with the sisters to whom I minister before the next conference. It's such a great reminder of why we take time for general conference.