This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday afternoon session of the October 2012 General Conference.
Thursday morning I got a call from the nurse at the school where my husband teaches asking me to come pick him up. He had passed out in class and wasn't feeling well. A few minutes later, before I had a chance to leave, the nurse called back saying that EMT's were transporting him to a hospital. When I arrived at the hospital he was already in the Catheterization Lab having a procedure done. I was taken into a private room to wait for the doctor to talk to me. A cardiologist came in to explain that they had found he had four major arteries blocked anywhere from 70-90%. They wanted to do open heart surgery and a quadruple bypass. Another doctor, a cardiac surgeon, came in to explain all of that to me. I broke down into tears at the enormity of the situation.
The surgeon decided to do one more test of his heart function to make sure he would survive the surgery and found that his heart function was less than the 25% threshold. It was decided that they would attempt other means to open the blockages--stents and balloons. The doctor was able to open three arteries and left the fourth for later. Sometime during all this my husband had a mini-stroke that affected only his left leg. He will have to go to Rehab for therapy before he can come home.
Clearing all the blockages didn't completely cure the Ventricular Tachycardia or V-tach, so he'll have to have a defibrillator implanted before he leaves the hospital. Oh yay.
This has been a hard week. It is not exactly a trial of my faith in Jesus Christ, but it is sure a trial of my strength and endurance, so Elder Neil L. Andersen's talk was especially pertinent to me.
How do you remain "steadfast and immovable" during a trial of faith? You immerse yourself in the very things that helped build your core of faith: you exercise faith in Christ, you pray, you ponder the scriptures, you repent, you keep the commandments, and you serve others. . . . It is within the sanctuary of the Church that we protect our faith. Meeting together with others who believe, we pray and find answers to our prayers; we worship through music, share testimony of the Savior, serve one another, and feel the Spirit of the Lord.
I went to church on Sunday because I wanted to thank the Saints for their prayers and to bear testimony of the goodness and tender mercies of God.
In the footnotes of Elder Andersen's talk is a quote from President George Q. Cannon that resonated with me:
No matter how serious the trial, how deep the distress, how great the affliction, [God] will never desert us. He never has, and He never will. He cannot do it. It is not in His character. He is an unchangeable being; the same yesterday, the same today, and He will be the same throughout the eternal ages to come. We have found that God. We have made Him our friend, by obeying His Gospel; and He will stand by us. We may pass through the fiery furnace; we may pass through deep waters; but we will not be consumed nor overwhelmed. We shall emerge from all these trials and difficulties the better and purer for them, if we only trust in our God and keep His commandments.
I'm doing my best to do so. I must have some fairly rough edges to polish off, or tarnished bits to polish up before I pass my mortal test because the trials just keep coming! But I refuse to give in or give up. I want to prove faithful and endure to the end.
