" . . . This is my voice unto all."

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the General Young Women Meeting session of the April 2010 conference.

I remembered these talks, although at the time I wasn't in Young Women, but I loved listening to the counsel and encouragement of these sessions and miss the special sessions just for women, young and old.

As I listened and studied this time around I felt that this counsel was for all of us. (See D & C 25:16) No matter how old we get, we are still young, inexperienced and learning compared to our Heavenly Father and our Savior. No mortal is too old for good advice.

Recently, I heard a reaction video to a podcast of a woman, formerly a member of the Church. As a teen she was given a For the Strength of Youth booklet and was initially excited to receive it. But upon reading it she questioned whether this list of "do's and don'ts" was all that Heavenly Father had to offer. She had deeper questions. She wondered if He really cared about "swearing, coffee, and tattoos?" In the comments I wrote that "Heavenly Father cares about obedience!" The ancient Israelites had some rather peculiar commandments too. He teaches us obedience by asking us to do, or not do, small things first, and when we prove ourselves we are then ready to take on more important covenants and commandments. 

Sister Anne M. Dibb said, ". . . avoid the temptations that surround you by strictly following the commandments." I wonder if that woman would have had a different outcome if she'd chosen to be obedient and learn line upon line, precept upon precept as she was ready to harken and understand. 

Sister Mary N. Cook advised us to "live to be worthy of the companionship of the Holy Ghost. . . . You will need that peace and assurance when Satan tries to confuse you with winds of doubt, when you are tempted to take another path, or when others are unkind or mock you for your beliefs." We stay worthy of the the constant companionship of the Holy Ghost by exercising faith in Jesus Christ to obey commandments we don't fully understand, repenting when we fall short (that's every day), and continuing to press forward. 

Women like to feel attractive. We are often hyper-focused on beauty. The internet has not helped our cause. We unfairly compare ourselves to photoshopped perfection and feel that we fall far short of an unrealistic ideal. I love what Sister Elaine Dalton has to say about a fortuitous meeting with a prophet's wife. "On that fall day in Huntsville, Utah, I was reminded of my divine identity, and I learned about what I now call 'deep beauty'--the kind of beauty that shines from the inside out. It is the kind of beauty that cannot be painted on, surgically created, or purchased. It is the kind of beauty that doesn't wash off. It is spiritual attractiveness. Deep beauty springs from virtue. It is the beauty of being chaste and morally clean. . . . It is a beauty that is earned through faith, repentance, and honoring covenants."

I don't think they coordinate their talks exactly, but I sure love how the spirit prompts them in what they say and how it all dovetails together so superbly.

President Dieter F. Uchtdorf then gave us this encouragement: "How beloved you are of your Heavenly Father. Though it may seem that you are alone, angels attend you. Though you may feel that no one can understand the depth of your despair, our Savior, Jesus Christ, understands. He suffered more than we can possibly imagine, and He did it for us. He did it for you. You are not alone."

I never cease to be amazed at how what I study is exactly what I need to hear in that moment!

A Theme Emerges

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday afternoon session of the April 2010 conference.

As I reviewed this week's talks and looked at what I had underlined a theme revealed itself to me. I guess you can tell what's on your mind by what stands out in a talk.

Elder Russell M. Nelson spoke of Generations Linked in Love, saying, "While the family is under attack throughout the world, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints proclaims, promotes, and protects the truth that the family is central to the Creator's plan for the eternal destiny of His Children."

I'm reminded of the words of Nephi that when God gives a commandment He prepares a way to obey that commandment. (1 Nephi 3:7) We are commanded to be fruitful and multiply, to have a family, so Our Heavenly Father will give us the tools and help we need to be successful accomplishing that.

Elder Robert D. Hales said, "The greatest rescue, the greatest activation will be in our homes. If someone in your family is wandering in strange paths, you are a rescuer, engaged in the greatest rescue effort the Church as ever known. I testify from personal experience: There is no failure except in giving up. It is never too early or too late to begin."

Is there a family anywhere in the church who doesn't have challenges? I don't know of any. Mortal life is hard and dangerous. I love the encouragement to never give up, and that's it's not too early or too late. I think it's important to remember that our task is to provide opportunity for them to use their agency to make choices. We are not accountable for their choices, only that we gave them the knowledge and opportunity to make them. That's hard to remember because our love for our children causes us to feel like a failure when our teachings and guidance are rejected. But it's not so different from the experiences of full-time missionaries. They aren't accountable for all the rejection they experience (goodness, I hope not!), only for their effort of sharing the gospel and their testimonies.

Elder Bradley D. Foster said, "Brothers and sisters, in a world where everyone is granted agency, some of our loved one may stray for a season. But we can never give up. We must always go back for them--we must never stop trying."

Again, the assurance that we must never give up. I know from spiritual experiences with our son James, that Heavenly Father's mercy extends beyond this life; He has a plan for each of His children to have the right opportunity to repent and accept the Savior's Atonement. He wants to save all of His children!

Elder James B. Martino said, "As we pass through the trials of life, let us keep an eternal perspective, let us not complain, let us become even more prayerful, let us serve others, and let us forgive one another."

I struggled as a missionary because I wanted to do something to soften the hearts of the people and show them that we were good Christians. The missionaries today are so blessed to have the freedom to serve in the community and show their faith by their works. I know this also is effective in families. I've worked hard to show my straying children that no matter what they choose I will love them and not cut them off from my love. I have told them I don't like their choices, but I still love them because I see their goodness. (Fortunately, they are hard workers, good citizens, serving in the military, etc., they just have rejected the Gospel.)

Elder Gregory A. Schwitzer said, "Good judgement is needed not only in understanding people but also in facing decisions that often lead us to or away from our Heavenly Father. . . . A relationship of listening often requires a quiet environment in which we can take time to ponder and hear the still, small voice."

I enjoy time with my children, one on one. I like to learn about the things each is interested in and encourage them in developing their talents and interests. There is usually a way to work in a gospel lesson by analogy when conversing about the things they love. And spending time together gives the Spirit a chance to inspire me about my child. I'm not perfect, I get impatient and frustrated. I often wonder if Heavenly Father has forgotten my family. But then a tender mercy appears and I know He loves our family and wants us to succeed.

Elder Francisco J. Viñas said, "It is interesting to notice that he [Alma the Younger] taught and gave his children their charge separately, adapting his instructions to each son, according to that son's needs. He bore testimony and taught them doctrine, preparing them to teach those same principles to others."

Alma is a superb example of a good parent. He had the power of discernment and used it to better understand each son (and hopefully his daughters). We parents often lament that our children don't come with instructions manuals. However, we can go directly to their maker for understanding and guidance. While raising our five I often prayed to know how to teach them and train them. The answers came! I could have done better, I suppose, but I did the best I could in the circumstances I was. 

Elder Neil L. Andersen said, ". . . my counsel is to speak more frequently about Jesus Christ. In His holy name is great spiritual power. . . . If a child is not listening, don't despair. Time and truth are on your side. At the right moment, your words will return as if from heaven itself. Your testimony will never leave your children."

One day I asked my children if they could tell what was most important in my life. "Yes, mom, the gospel," was their unanimous answer. Good, I was doing something right! I hope they will have called up to their minds my testimony and example when they most need it and are ready to return to the fold of the Savior.

And finally, President Thomas S. Monson said, " I urge you to study the messages, to ponder their teachings, and then to apply them in your life."

This is important advice for parents! (And other family members) Reviewing the past talks has strengthened me as much as reading The Book of Mormon. The talks given in our day are the equivalent of the sermons recorded in scriptures. They are relevant to the times and circumstances in which we live, and are in language and analogy that we can clearly understand. I don't feel complete without listening to and reading a conference talk or two each day.

Actions Speak Louder than Words

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Sunday morning session of the April 2010 conference.

My husband and I speak different love languages. His language is Words of Affirmation, and mine is Acts of Service. To me talk is cheap, unless followed by action. He feels neglected if I don't speak my feelings, not seeing all of my actions as expressions of love. We struggle to communicate.

President Uchtdorf said, "True love requires action. We can speak of love all day long--we can write notes or poems that proclaim it, sing songs that praise it, and preach sermons that encourage it--but until we manifest that love in action, our words are nothing but 'sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.' . . . Christ did not just speak about love, He showed it each day of His life."

I think we need to become multi-lingual in love languages but if we are following the example of our Savior, acts of service, which is a form of gift giving (another love language), can express love in practical, measurable, demonstrable ways.

Service is usually not convenient, easy, or quick. It can be, but the most meaningful service often takes thought and preparation, or is terribly inconvenient. I think that is why we are encouraged to visit each other as part of ministering. By spending time with you in your home I can see, hear, and discern needs or wants. Our son James was especially good at that. He paid attention to what I would casually mention in conversation, and the next holiday (Christmas, birthday, Mother's Day) I'd get the very thing I'd mentioned. I miss him! He listened, and at every meal he ate at my house after he'd left home, he would help clear the table and then help with doing the dishes. His love language seemed to be Service and Gifts too. At least he learned those languages and spoke them fluently.

The Primary song, "I'm trying to be like Jesus" is instructive of what we're striving for, to show kindness is all that we do and say. President Nelson's call for peacemakers is another way to show love and be like the Savior. It all fits together. 

Counsel from the First Presidency

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Priesthood session of the April 2010 conference.

Even though I study the gospel every day I have felt my spirituality draining away for reasons that I don't fully understand. Have I had such powerful experiences in the past that I don't feel anything less than that? Are there sins I need to repent of? (Yes, always.) Am I being tested further? (Probably, of course.) Am I studying or doing the wrong things, or for the wrong reasons? (I don't know.)

I'm glad that I am studying the past General Conferences as their messages seem tailor made for my situation today. How does that work?

The talks by the First Presidency were especially meaningful to me. Even though they were speaking to the men of the church I could feel that their counsel applied almost equally to the women. At least to this woman.

President Uchtdorf talked about continuing in patience. We are in the midst of a move at the moment and life feels rather unsettled, because it actually is. I can't see the end of this situation and have to go forward with faith in every footstep.  

He says, "From that experience, I learned that patience is far more than simply waiting for something to happen--patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn't appear instantly or without effort. . . . Patience means actively waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can--working, hoping, exercising faith, bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well."

I'm revisiting the lesson that I often have to take a step forward without knowing the next step. 

I know for sure that the promises of the Lord, if perhaps not always swift, are always certain. . . . Often we can't see the Lord's hand in our lives until long after trials have passed. 

I think that will prove to be true of the trials I am going through right now. There is a purpose, which I can't see, for the things that are happening. My job is to be faithful no matter what.

 

 Patience is truly a fruit of the Spirit. Patience means staying with something until the end. [I always think of pregnancy] It means delaying immediate gratification for future blessings. It means reining in anger and holding back the unkind word. It means resisting evil, even it appears to be making others rich.

I am learning that patience is an important Godly virtue. Heavenly Father is eternally patient with me in my weakness and stumbling. I must learn to be patient with others, and with circumstances outside of my control, enduring faithfully and actively until I receive the promised blessings.

President Eyring continued the theme with a talk about acting in all diligence. He said, "When I find myself drawn away from my [Relief Society] duties by other interests and when my body begs for rest, I give to myself this rallying cry: Remember Him. . . . He taught us a lesson by what He did in three days in the spirit world before His Resurrection, which I remember whenever I am tempted to feel that I have finished some hard task in His service and deserve a rest." 

I'll be sixty-eight this year, part of my brain says it is time to retire, but hearing the Apostles speak reminds me that they don't get to retire and they are a decade or two or three older than me! 

I close now with this counsel to the Lord's [Relief Society] servants. Ponder deeply and diligently in the scriptures and in the words of living prophets. Persist in prayer for the Holy Ghost to reveal to you the nature of God the Father and His Beloved Son. Plead that the Spirit will show you what the Lord wants you to do. Plan to do it. Promise Him to obey. Act with determination until you have done what He asked. And then pray to give thanks for the opportunity to serve and to know what you might do next.

I now have my instructions!

President Monson added to the theme with Preparation Brings Blessings. He said, "Let us consider our callings, let us reflect on our responsibilities, and let us follow Jesus Christ, our Lord."

Right now I don't have any formal callings because we've had our records transferred to our new branch. No matter, I'm still under covenant to share the gospel, serve my fellowman, and be an example of the believer. We have new neighbors just behind us. They are a lovely family and I've already had opportunities to serve them, and they me. I'm sad we can't stay and enjoy their friendship longer. I hope for a way and opportunity to share the gospel with them.

President Monson addresses an issue in 2010 that I've seen recently on social media regarding member's dress and grooming. He said, "The way you dress sends messages about yourself to others and often influences the way you and others act. Dress in such a way to bring out the best in yourself and those around you. Avoid extremes in clothing and appearance, including tattoos and piercings."

I've never heard any of the apostles rescind what President Hinckley taught about tattoos and piercings in 2000, but there seems to be a whole lot of people who think it is okay. I know we're expected to be accepting and give grace to converts who didn't know any better. But perhaps we could rewatch his address from 2000 (isn't it wonderful to have access to past talks) to educate those who are like the little children of King Benjamin's time and didn't hear or understand the prophet's counsel.

One line in particular stood out to me from President Monson's talk. He said, "Remember that prayer is the passport to spiritual power." That hit me hard because I realized prayer is what I'm struggling with the most. 

When I was raising our five children I had rules we followed when going shopping. Because we homeschooled I took our five everywhere with me. Two of the rules were: 1) Stay by Mom, close enough to touch her; 2) No whining or begging. Number 2 was in case they asked for something and I said no, or not today. I didn't want to negotiate or listen to them whining and begging. Because of that rule I've wondered and pondered, does Heavenly Father feel the same way when I ask for something over and over again? Am I whining and begging? I often think, well, I've asked once and He knows what I asked for, if He's ready to give it to me it will happen, if not, okay, He knows best. This is a struggle for me, and I want to understand and do and be better.

I know that my Heavenly Father loves me because He sends me little messages through His Apostles that answer questions and concerns I have. We are richly blessed when we study their words.

 

 

Not So Random Thoughts

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday afternoon session of the April 2010 conference.

Elder L. Tom Perry - The leaders of the Church spend a great deal of time thinking about how to improve teaching in the Church. Why do we invest this time and effort? It is because we believe in the immense power of teaching to increase the faith of individuals and strengthen families.

During my service as a Relief Society president I asked the Branch President if we could use the Sunday School time for all of the adults in the branch to participate in the teacher improvement course. His response was that he couldn't stop the whole branch to do that. He felt that too many of the adults would never become stellar teachers. I said that probably was true but they could become better students, better Sacrament Meeting speakers, and better Family Home Evening leaders in their own homes. Nope, he wouldn't consent to do it. So we plowed on ahead with untrained, inadequate teachers in just about every class. I felt so bad that he didn't see the value of "sharpening the saw" in the branch.

Elder D. Todd Christofferson - The word of God, as Alma said, is like a seed planted in our hearts that produces faith as it begins to grow within us (See Alma 32:27-43; see also Romans 10:13-17). Faith will not come from the study of ancient texts as a purely academic pursuit. It will not come from archaeological digs and discoveries. It will not come from scientific experiments. It will not even come from witnessing miracles. These things may serve to confirm faith, or at times to challenge it, but they do not create faith. Faith comes by the witness of the Holy Spirit to our souls, Spirit to spirit, as we hear or read the word of God. And faith matures as we continue to feast upon the word.

In my life I had some wonderful teachers to ignite my love of the gospel through the scriptures, beginning with my father and grandfather. Seminary and Institute teachers guided my study for a half dozen years before I served a mission and delved deeper into the word of God each day in preparation for teaching it to others. Before I ever heard Elder Bednar teach it, I found patterns and connections in the scriptures that spoke to my heart and I felt the confirmation of the Spirit of their truthfulness.

Elder Bruce A. Carlson - . . . strict obedience to God's laws brings His blessings and failure to abide by His laws leads to foreseeable consequences. . . . faithful obedience, regardless of the apparent size of the task, will bring the Lord's guidance, assistance and peace.

We are commanded to study the scriptures and teach them to one another. Is it any wonder that the Church invests time and effort to help us? Why are local leaders to reluctant to utilize the help available and more firmly encourage improvement? I do not understand it.

Elder David A. Bednar - Such learning requires spiritual, mental, and physical exertion and not just passive reception. . . . What a glorious opportunity for family members to search the scriptures together and to be tutored by the Holy Ghost. . . . The spiritual discernment and inspiration you will receive from the combination of these three holy habits [Reading and talking about the Book of Mormon, Bearing testimony spontaneously, Inviting children to act] will enable you to stand as watchmen on the tower for your families--"watching. . . with all perseverance" (Ephesians 6:18)--to the blessing of your immediate family and your future posterity.

Oh how we need to be better learners and teachers. Many come to church hungering and thirsting for doctrine as well as strength and fellowship. I know I do! I don't want gospel "twinkies", I want a rich spread to feast upon and discuss with others as we share our insights, testimonies, and experiences.

Built Upon A Rock

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday morning session of the April 2010 conference.

A few weeks ago I gave a talk comparing our mortal journey toward the Celestial Kingdom to past "pioneer" journeys such as Moses and the children of Israel, Lehi and his family, and westward expansion pioneers including the famous Mormon Pioneers.

No analogy is perfect, but I can testify that whatever challenge we face we must keep pressing forward. We cannot sit down and wait until we aren't facing any challenges. Life doesn't work that way. We have to keep going to reach our Promised Land. We must endure faithfully and obediently to the end. (From my talk, 25 May 2025)

This past week has tested my resolve! The clutch on my car burned out. The tender mercy was that it happened just as I rolled into the Walmart parking lot a couple of blocks from the dealership. I got the car towed to the service department and they accepted it but they couldn't even look at it until a week later. The tender mercy was that they had a loaner I could use. On the same day, my husband fell down the stairs at the house he's working on in Iowa, twisting his ankle and getting banged up. That put a hold on the furniture moving we had planned for the weekend. Then on Saturday night in the midst of a heat wave with day time temps in the high 90's the air conditioning stopped working. I melted into a puddle on Sunday, but the tender mercy was that on Monday the temperature moderated and a lovely breeze blew all the hot air out of the house. Tuesday, as I type this, it's even cooler with a stronger breeze. Thankfully, we have ceiling fans in all the rooms.

All of this combined to discourage me and I've cried lots of tears. I won't go into all the other problems I'm facing just now. But it's overwhelming.

I appreciated Elder Wilford. W. Andersen's talk The Rock of Our Redeemer. He described the early saints as they were forced out of the homes in Nauvoo in the depths of winter.

These early Saints were indeed homeless, but they were not hopeless. Their hearts were broken, but their spirits were strong. They had learned a profound and important lesson. They had learned that hope, with its attendant blessings of peace and joy, does not depend upon circumstance. They had discovered that the true source of hope is faith--faith in the Lord Jesus Christ and in His infinite Atonement, the one sure foundation upon which to build our lives.

Yes, I have learned to rely on my Savior too. I can't see the future, but I have assurances that it will all work out. "I do not ask to see the distant scene--one step enough for me."(Hymn 97 Lead Kindly Light)

Like the pioneers of old, I can't sit by waiting for things to happen. I have to keep moving forward, doing what I can and having faith that the next step will be revealed to me.

 

Faith in the Savior requires more than mere belief. The Apostle James taught that even the devils believe and tremble (James 2:9). But true faith requires work. The difference between the devils and the faithful members of this Church is not belief but work. Faith grows by keeping commandments. We must work at keeping the commandments.

The commandment I'm currently working on has to do with praying with more faith and fervor. I struggle to reconcile my desire to ask for things, and my hesitancy to "whine and beg". While raising our children I would tell them not to whine and beg for things. I heard them the first time and when the time was right, if the request was reasonable, I would provide. If I said no, then I really didn't want to hear any whining and begging. I don't know if Heavenly Father feels the same way. Or am I supposed to keep pleading until He gives in? I don't want to be like Martin Harris. It's a question that I haven't found an answer to.

I do know that it is my Savior, Redeemer and Friend who is my Rock; the one I cling to when the storms are fierce around me. He is the One I turn to for succor and relief when the trials are overwhelming. He is my comfort when tears spill down without ceasing. He is who I have build the foundation of my life on. He is the only one who has never let me down, or frustrated or disappointed me. I love Him with all my heart and soul and mind and strength.