Teaching to Understand

This post is part of the General Conference Odyssey. This week covers the Saturday morning session of the April 2012 General Conference.

My mom worked as a secretary at an adult night school until I was about eight or nine. We had dinner at 5:00 each night and then she would leave to go to work. My older siblings would clean up from dinner, and then at bedtime dad would put my younger brother and I to bed. He was never as gentle and kind as my mom. When I was eight or nine, the bishop counseled my parents that my mother should quit work and stay home as my older siblings were teens and needed her home more than we needed any money she was earning. My parents obeyed that counsel and she found other ways to bring in a little money to help the family budget.

Before I married I made sure that my husband knew that when I became a mother I'd stay home and raise our children. He didn't think we could make it on one income, but I assured him that I knew how to do it. I worked until about six weeks before our first child was born. Then again when she was 19 I took a job because my husband had lost his and we needed some income. Those two years I worked were some of the worst ever.

Sister Cheryl A. Esplin, Second Counselor in the Primary General Presidency, talked about teaching children to not only know the doctrine but, as we are instructed in Doctrine and Covenants 68:25, to understand the doctrine.

She tells a wonderful story of her daughter and granddaughter's experience with a teaching moment, then says, "These moments are spontaneous and unplanned and happen in the normal flow of family life. They come and go quickly, so we need to be alert and recognize a teaching moment when our children come to us with a question or worry, when they have problems getting along with siblings or friends, when they need to control their anger, when they make a mistake, or when they need to make a decision."

Because of a confluence of forces today there are very few stay-at-home mothers. Women are stretched to the breaking point with being a wife, mother, homemaker and breadwinner. Families allow or encourage their children to be in so many after school activities that there is little to no time for parents to pick up on those spontaneous and unplanned teaching moments. If they do recognize them, most are too tired and stressed to act upon them. 

I don't know what the answer is for each individual, that will require individuals, couples and families to study, ponder and pray about their situation; but I'm sure grateful my mother was obedient to the counsel to stay home.

Sister Esplin explains, "We can know our children are beginning to understand the doctrine when we see it revealed in their attitudes and actions without external threats or rewards. As our children learn to understand gospel doctrines, they become more self-reliant and more responsible. They become part of the solution to our family challenges and make a positive contribution to the environment of our home and the success of our family."

That sounds wonderful.