Mother's Day Talk - I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus

Years ago when I was a first time mom, my older sister, who was at the tail end of hands on mothering, said that motherhood is the only job where by the time you figure out what you're doing, you're out of a job. Now past the time of being a hands on mom myself I've found that to be true. I'd do a much better job of raising our children if I could do it over with the knowledge and experience that I have now. Because I hope to be an eternal heavenly mother I don't have to stop learning and growing in the skills and knowledge it takes to be a perfect mother. We don't know anything about our eternal mother other than that she exists, but our Heavenly Parents sent a very special brother of ours to earth to be our example. Jesus Christ teaches us how to be a celestial being, and how to be able to live in the Celestial world. He told us to follow Him; He told us to do the things we saw him do, and He told us that we ought to be like Him.

While not all women will get the opportunity to be physical mothers in this life we all can be spiritual and emotional mothers to those around us. We all can develop the qualities and characteristics of Jesus.

I remember more than once singing with the children in Primary "I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus", and feeling convicted by the Spirit that I wasn't doing very well being like Him in my mothering.  Do you know the words?

I'm trying to be like Jesus; I'm following in His ways.

I'm trying to love as he did, in all that I do and say.

At times I am tempted to make a wrong choice,

But I try to listen as the still small voice whispers,

 

Love one another as Jesus loves you.

Try to show kindness in all that you do.

Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,

For these are the things Jesus taught.

 

I'm trying to love my neighbor; I'm learning to serve my friends.

I watch for the day of gladness when Jesus will come again.

I try to remember the lessons he taught.

Then the Holy Spirit enters into my thoughts, saying:

 

Love one another as Jesus loves you.

Try to show kindness in all that you do.

Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought,

For these are the things Jesus taught.

I'd like to review some of the ways we can try to be like Jesus and be a better person, male or female, better women, and better mothers.

Jesus knew the scriptures. Of course He did, He dictated them to the prophets! But during His mortal ministry He used them to refute Satan's lies in His hour of temptation. He used them to teach others, and He used them when testifying of His mission.

I sat in the Tabernacle in 1978 listening to President Spencer W. Kimball speak, and what he said has directed my life ever since. Speaking to the women of the church he said:

"Study the scriptures. Thus you may gain strength through the understanding of eternal things. You young women need this close relationship with the mind and will of our Eternal Father. We want our sisters to be scholars of the scriptures as well as our men. You need an acquaintanceship with his eternal truths for your own well being, and for the purposes of teaching your own children and all others who come within your influence." (Oct. 1978 Privileges and Responsibilities of Sisters)

We can be like Jesus by studying the scriptures, filling our minds and hearts with the word of God so it can be recalled when needed for teaching and testifying.

Jesus loved and welcomed children. Matthew records, "Then some children were brought to him so that he would lay hands upon them and pray, but the disciples rebuked them. But Jesus said, Allow the little children to come to me, and do not hinder them, because the kingdom of heaven belongs to ones like these." (Matt 19:14  The New Testament A Translation for Latter-Day Saints, Thomas A. Wayment)

 

Once when I was surrounded by the clamoring demands of five young children I told them to leave me alone, they were interrupting my work. Immediately into my mind the Spirit spoke "These children ARE your work!" Oh, . . . right. I forgot that I had entered into a partnership with God to assist in His work of bringing to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, by me bringing to pass the mortal life and spiritual education of five of His spirit children. It was a sobering moment.

 

Julie B. Beck, former Relief Society General President, said, "More than at any other time in the history of the world we need mothers who know. . . . When mothers know who they are and who God is and have made covenants with Him, they will have great power and influence for good on their children." (Oct 2007, Mothers Who Know)

 

While Sheri L. Dew, a single sister, was serving in the General Relief Society Presidency, she said,

As daughters of our Heavenly Father, and as daughters of Eve, we are all mothers and we have always been mothers. And we each have responsibilities to love and help lead the rising generation. How will our young women learn to live as women of God unless they see what women of God look like, meaning what we wear, watch, and read; how we fill our time and our minds; how we face temptation and uncertainty; where we find true joy; and why modesty and femininity are hallmarks of righteous women? How will our young men learn to value women of God if we don't show them the virtue of our virtues?" (Oct 2001, Are We Not All Mothers?)

 

We can be like Jesus by welcoming children into our lives, whether by birth, or adoption, or friendship, and leading them to the Savior and Our Heavenly Father.

 

Jesus taught His followers spiritual concepts, doctrines and principles in ways they could understand using familiar situations and objects. He taught them through parables, or stories.

 

The more we study the gospel in scriptures and general conference talks the easier it is to teach others. Filling our minds with things of eternity gives the Holy Ghost so much more to work with when bringing things to our remembrance when teaching moments arise.

 

We can be like Jesus by turning off the distractions of worldly media then looking at the natural world around us, inside and outside, to see what connections we can make to gospel doctrines and principles. Alma told Korihor that ". . . all things denote there is a God . . ." (Alma 30:44) Object lessons are all around us if we'll just look, and then share them with others as part of our testimonies.

 

Jesus went about doing good. He mercifully healed the blind, deaf, lame, leprous, and withered. And we're told by John that if all Jesus did ". . . should be written every one, I suppose that even the world itself could not contain the books that should be written." (John 21:25)

 

We can be merciful like Jesus in similar ways. Many around us are blinded by the subtle indoctrination of worldly attitudes and falsehoods. We can teach truth and lead others to the Light of the Gospel. Some are so centered on self or other idols that they cannot hear. Perhaps our quiet example would help them to understand an unspoken testimony of the Plan of Salvation, and invite them to listen to the whisperings of the Spirit. Some are lame and halted by sin or addiction and unable to motivate or discipline themselves. Maybe they could lean on our strength as they allow the Savior to rebuild their own. Some people are leprous with sinful worldly attitudes and need to be bathed in love and acceptance to be able to change. Some are withered by an absence of hope and need our cheerful optimism and faithful obedience as a guide to looking to the Savior and His Plan. No matter how someone is afflicted we can lead them to the healing power of Jesus Christ.

 

Jesus comforted those who were mourning. Mary and Martha's brother Lazarus died and the sisters were bereft. He comforted them by testifying that He is the resurrection and the life, and "though [Lazaruz is] dead, yet shall he live." (John 11:25) Then when Jesus was led to the sepulcher He wept. He too mourned the death of a friend. He understands.

 

We can be like Jesus by mourning with those who are bereft by the death of a loved one. We can comfort them with our testimony of the resurrection. We can share strength and hope as we continue together on our own mortal journeys.

 

Jesus was encouraging to those who struggled. When the woman caught in adultery was brought before Him, He didn't join in the mob's condemnation of her. He asked the mob to examine their own consciences, then waiting until they dispersed, He said to the woman, "Neither do I condemn thee; go and sin no more." (John 8:11)

 

We can be like Jesus by encouraging others to repent and turn from their sins, without condemning them for their sins. We can be a light and example to lead them to the redeeming power of the Savior to forgive and restore a life mired in sin. His example of asking a penetrating question to disburse the mob, then waiting for a private moment to speak to the sinner is instructive to us on how to treat others, especially children.

 

Jesus showed a firm, controlled hand when confronting evil and wickedness. At the time of the passover, ". . . Jesus went up to Jerusalem, and found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting: And when he had a made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables; And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise." (John 2:13-16)

 

We can be like Jesus by not allowing into our homes or church buildings any worldly things or practices that prevent or detract from having the Spirit of the Lord in our holy places. King Benjamin taught, ". . .neither will ye suffer that they (our own children or others in our care) transgress the laws of God, and fight and quarrel one with another, and serve the devil, who is the master of sin, or who is the evil spirit which hath been spoken of by our  fathers, he being an enemy to all righteousness. But ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another."  (Mosiah 4:14-15)

 

Sometimes we have to put our foot down and take a firm, hard stance against the evils that attempt to creep into our homes. Jesus didn't want any pollutions in His Father's house and neither should we want any in ours.

 

After washing His apostle's feet before their last passover meal together, Jesus instructed them, ". . . I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you." (John 13:15) And "If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them." (John 13:17)

 

I'm trying to be like Jesus, I hope you are too. We know it's hard because Satan doesn't want us to be like Jesus. He wants us to be miserable like himself, carnal (giving in to our fleshy appetites), sensual (trusting only our five senses and neglecting our spiritual side), and devilish (giving in to temptation, disregarding our covenants, and disobeying the commandments). But together, as we encourage and nurture each other we can overcome the devil and walk with Jesus on the path to Eternal Life. He is with us every step of the way, as long as we are trying, repenting, and trying again.

 

I testify that God, Our Heavenly Father lives. Jesus Christ is our Spiritual Father, Savior and Redeemer, Example and Friend. We can grow to be like them because it is in our spiritual DNA to do so.

 

In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Mother's Day 2024

Today's Talk in Sacrament Meeting

 Christmas Gifts

Christmas time! The most wonderful time of the year, according to one song. Do you have the Christmas spirit? You know, feelings of love and generosity, joy and happiness, laughter and good times with family and friends,? That Christmas spirit? Sometimes I feel more like old Ebenezer Scrooge. Curmudgeony, wanting to be left alone and not bothered with all the work of preparations for a few minutes of a gift opening frenzy, a huge meal consumed in ten minutes, only to be left with all the clean-up. It's not really like that, only sometimes do those negative thoughts and feelings well up. Mostly Christmas is a happy time of good cheer with family and friends.

But speaking of Ebenezer, he is the main character in my favorite Christmas book and movie. His transformation represents the real gifts we are given at Christmas from Our Father in Heaven through His son Jesus Christ, and the gifts that we can give back to Him.

Christmas is the celebration of a birthday. Generally in our culture we give gifts to the person whose birthday we're celebrating. But Jesus isn't physically present today so it's rather difficult to give Him physical gifts. To explain this concept to our children I used to tell them that Jesus taught that, "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." (Matt 25:40) And, ". . . when you are in the service of your fellow beings ye are only in the service of your God." (Mosiah 2:17) For almost thirty years now we have used a manger with a baby Jesus doll to help us remember just whose birthday we're celebrating. The gifts are piled around the manger as if we're giving them to Him. I found that the large, visual reminder helped our children focus more on who and why we were celebrating.

We usually give birthday or other gifts because we love the person and want to please him or her. I like to listen for clues all year long as to what my loved ones need or want so I can give just the perfect thing. One year I heard my sister say in casual conversation that Emily Dickinson was her favorite poet. I surprised her that year with a book of her complete works. It moved my sister to tears; she asked, "How did you know?" I don't tell you this to brag--I've given my share of complete flops over the years. I tell you this because of the principle involved, that listening with ears to hear can lead to more meaningful gifts. 

What clues has Jesus given us about the gifts he would like to receive? 

To the ancient prophet Malachi He said, "Prove me now herewith. . . " and asked us to pay tithing. (Malachi 3:10)  The first recorded words of Jesus after He was baptized are, "Repent ye!" (Matt. 4:17) He called His disciples saying, "Follow me!" And at the last supper with them He said, "If any man serve me, let him follow me;" (John 12:26) After washing their feet, performing that lowly act of service in a loving manner, He instructed them, ". . . I have given you an example, that ye should do as I have done to you." (John 13:15) And "If ye know these things, happy are ye if ye do them." (John 13:17) Later that evening He told His apostles, "If ye love me, keep my commandments." (John 14:15) and "Love one another" (John 15:12) After His resurrection He asked His chief Apostle, Peter, to feed His sheep and lambs. (John 21:15-17) And to the Nephites gathered at the temple in Bountiful He said, ". . . will ye not now return unto me, and repent of your sins, and be converted that I may heal you? . . . And ye shall offer for a sacrifice unto me a broken heart and a contrite spirit." (3 Nephi 9:13, 20) These are just some of the many clues He gave us.

Now back to my friend Ebenezer. As a fictional character, he could represent any of us, going about our days without any thought of eternity, just trying to slog our way through this mortal life the best we can, accumulating worldly treasure of one kind or another. God was merciful to old Scrooge though, and sent Spirits to open his eyes to the purpose of life, and the law of the harvest, that what we sow in life we will reap. 

Our current prophet, Russell M. Nelson reminds us to "think celestial"! Make decisions based on where we want to live in eternity and with whom.

 

Each spirit that visited Ebenezer opens his eyes further in understanding until at last he realizes his predicament, begs for mercy, and believing that he will die before the next Christmas pleads: "Spirit! Hear me! I am not the man I was. I will not be the man I must have been but for this intercourse. Why show me this if I am past all hope? . . . Good Spirit, Your nature intercedes for me, and pities me. Assure me that I yet may change these shadows you have shown me by an altered life!" He pledges to the Spirit of Christmas Future saying "I will honour Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year. I will live in the Past, the Present, and the Future. The Spirits of all Three shall strive within me. I will not shut out the lessons that they teach." When he awakes in the morning he realizes that he did not die and he has been given a second chance. "I don't know what to do! . . . I'm as light as a feather, I am as happy as an angel, I am as merry as a school-boy. . . . A merry Christmas to Everybody! A happy New Year to all the world!"

Ebenezer's fictional experience is similar to that of Alma the Younger in The Book of Mormon. After being visited by an angel of the Lord and in a coma for a time he was revived and began to speak to his father and the priests gathered around him. Alma bid "them to be of good comfort, for, said he, I have repented of my sins, and have been redeemed of the Lord; behold I am born of the Spirit. And the Lord said unto me: Marvel not that all mankind, yea, men and women, all nations, kindreds, tongues and people, must be born again; yea, born of God, changed from their carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters; And thus they become new creatures!" (Mosiah 27:24-26)

At another telling of his story, Alma said, 

And now, for three days and for three nights was I racked, even with the pains of a damned soul. And it came to pass that as I was thus racked with torment, while I was harrowed up by the memory of my many sins, behold, I remembered also to have heard my father prophesy unto the people concerning the coming of one Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world. Now, as my mind caught hold upon this thought, I cried within my heart: O Jesus, thou Son of God, have mercy on me, who am in the gall of bitterness, and am encircled about by the everlasting chains of death. And now, behold, when I thought this, I could remember my pains no more; yea, I was harrowed up by the memory of my sins no more. And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain! Yea, I say unto you, my son, that there could be nothing so exquisite and so bitter as were my pains. Yea, and again I say unto you, my son, that on the other hand, there can be nothing so exquisite and sweet as was my joy. (Alma 36:18-21)

The amazing thing in both of these stories is that neither of these men were forced to change. They were given the opportunity to choose to change.

Jesus said, "Behold, I stand at the door. and knock: if any man hear my voice and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me. (Rev. 3:20)

Elder W. Craig Zwick of the Seventy said, "The Lord will provide sustenance and support if we are willing to open the door and receive His hand of divine assistance." (Oct 2003)

Charles Dickens wrote of Ebenezer, "Scrooge was better than his word. He did it all, and infinitely more; . . . He became as good a friend, as good a master, and as good a man, as the good old city knew. . . . Some people laughed to see the alteration in him, but he let them laugh, and little heeded them; . . . His own heart laughed: and that was quite enough for him. . . . and it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge."

Alma spent the rest of his life preaching the gospel of Jesus Christ, and keeping the sacred records. Some of the best sermons in the Book of Mormon were given by Alma. Think of his sermons on Faith, the Atonement, Judgement, Resurrection, and more. It is from Alma that we get the best explanation of why evil deeds are allowed to happen. After his conversion he was a mighty father, prophet and leader.

We are celebrating the birth of the One who would grow up to accomplish the mission of the Great Atoning Sacrifice. Jesus is our Brother, our Spiritual Father, our Exemplar, our Healer, our Lord and Savior. We celebrate his mortal birth in gratitude for his love and mercy in coming to save us from the bonds of death and sin. His gifts to us of repentance and resurrection mean that we can be cleansed from our sin and be spiritually born again, and then instead of mortal death being the end of our existence, we will be reunited body and spirit to live eternally.

I think His gifts to us far outweigh any we can give to Him. But let's not let that discourage us. He asks us to repent!

Elder Dallin H. Oaks, then of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, said, "Repenting means giving up all your practices--personal, family, ethnic, and national--that are contrary to the commandments of God." (Oct. 2003)

Elder Dieter F. Uchtdorf said, "For some, to think of repentance as the pathway to joy might seem contradictory. Repentance, at times, can be painful and difficult. It requires admitting that some of our thoughts and actions—even some of our beliefs—have been wrong. Repentance also requires change, which, at times, can be uncomfortable. But joy and comfort are not the same thing. Sin—including the sin of complacency—limits our joy." (April 2023)

The spirits who visited Ebenezer Scrooge used his own words to help him see the error of his ways. 

Alma taught, "For our words will condemn us, yea, all our works will condemn us; we shall not be found spotless; and our thoughts will also condemn us; and in this awful state we shall not dare to look up to our God; and we would fain be glad if we could command the rocks and the mountains to fall upon us to hide us from his presence. But this cannot be; we must come forth and stand before him in his glory, and in his might, majesty and dominion, and acknowledge to our everlasting shame that all his judgements are just; that he is just in all his works, and that he is merciful unto the children of men, and that he has all power to save every man that believeth on his name and bringeth forth fruit meet for repentance." (Alma 12:14-15)

Do you think Alma knew what he was talking about? Do you think his experience built his testimony? It sure sounds like it to me.

Jesus asks us to love and serve others. Often the "others" are as close as our own family. The family is the heavenly pattern; we prepare to live in a Zion society, and in the Celestial Kingdom by practicing in our own imperfect earthly families. 

Jesus taught, "I am the light of the world; he that followeth me shall not walk in darkness, but shall have the light of life." (John 8:12) We are not left to try to figure things out by ourselves. We who have been baptized and confirmed have the gift of the Holy Ghost to guide us. We have a prophet and apostles, seventies and other church leaders who regularly give us instructions and guidance. We have scripture, ancient and modern. We have the vast resources of the church and the miracles of technology to access them. We can repent and follow Jesus! We can receive the gifts He has to offer us.

This Christmas season, may we invite the Spirit of the Lord into our homes and lives by repenting, obeying the commandments, loving and serving others, and sharing the Light of the Savior near and far.

I know that God, Our Heavenly Father lives and loves us enough to send His Son, our eldest brother, Jesus, to be Our Savior and Redeemer. I know that Jesus Christ restored His church through the prophet Joseph Smith and gave him the power to translate the Book of Mormon, Another testament of Jesus Christ. I know that Russell M. Nelson is the Lord's authorized prophet on earth today. We have so many gifts from God! May we acknowledge and appreciate them each day.

Our Son

 

James Frederick Thoelke
17 September 1996 - 24 April 2023

Our precious son took his life yesterday. He had struggled for many years with deep feelings of worthlessness, and alcohol, a dangerous combination. The demons who tormented him wore him down to where he couldn't take anymore.

He leaves a huge hole in our hearts and will be missed until we all graduate from this mortal boarding school and meet again. My mother was with us, by my bedside, when James was born, I think she held him first. His was the only one of our children's baptisms that my parents were able to attend. I hope they were the first to greet him on the other side.

I'm so grateful for the bedrock of my testimony and can say, like Job of old, "I know that my redeemer liveth, and that he shall stand at the latter day upon the earth: And though after my skin worms destroy this body, yet in my flesh shall I see God." (Job 19:25-26)

Part of the Sunday School Lesson I Didn't Get to Give

A big snowstorm passed through Minnesota on Sunday and our little branch cancelled church. We drove north and attended with our daughter at her ward. 

This is just an insight I gained as I pondered the lesson material, but didn't get to share with any class.

We must be born again to enter the Kingdom of God

ASK – What happens when we are “born again”?

Let’s compare a new born baby and a new born Christian.

A baby learns to walk and talk like his parents.

A Christian learns to walk and talk like Jesus

How do babies learn to walk?

They crawl, scoot, walk with assistance, then walk alone. They fall down a lot! But they never give up, they watch others and believe (have faith) that they can walk too.

How do babies learn to talk?

By listening, imitating, trying, making lots of mistakes; listening some more and never giving up.

Perhaps this is what Jesus was referring to when he commanded us to become like little children in learning to become like Him. We must keep trying and never give up; we must keep watching Him and listening to Him (by studying the scriptures and words of modern prophets), and imitating Him until His ways are internalized and become utterly effortless and natural to us.